The alcohol effect..

Most of you might know what it would feel like to taste an alcoholic substance or beverage like brandy or vodka. These alcoholic beverages make you look so funny and whatever you do after consuming alcohol would, for sure, entertain the others around you. I had been to pubs several times and I have seen people becoming too emotional after few shots of vodka or any other alcoholic drink for this issue. I don't understand why they turn emotional when they are completely out of their senses. Another characteristic feature of alcohol consumers is they lose control over themselves and they would find it really difficult to stop with the last shot they had. Thus, if a person has a peg of brandy and flies away out of the world to the heavens, as described by most drunken dudes, he would not think twice to go for another shot even if he had built a strong principle of not going beyond the alcoholic edge while and before entering the pub. Hence, he forgets his own principles and self-built rules and won't hesitate to go for as many shots at the alcohol as possible, no matter how much his wallet can handle. Another set of people are those who don't like the way alcoholic beverages taste but try them just to experience the 'HEAVENLY DELIGHT', as defined once again by alcoholics, at the end of the shot. Some people like the smell of alcohol and they drink voraciously just to bring everything that went in them out through the process called 'VOMIT'. (Disgusting??? Sorry. Can't help it.. :P) Recently, when I went to a pub, I happened to get the sight of a man who, I suppose, had already crossed several shots of brandy. Suddenly, his unsteady eyes threw a stare at me. I knew I shouldn't have looked down upon him like that. He gestured at me in attempt to get to know what was so interesting about him that made me turn my attention to him. That was when I decided not to take my eyes on any of those within a pub. Apart from these, so many other funny incidents can be experienced when you meet an alcoholic gentleman. The best of all these traits of a drunken man in Tamil Nadu is that he would start delivering movie dialogues, imagining he is the hero of the hour! If you get a chance by your luck, do meet a drunken man and you would realize what real entertainment is!

The Ironman..

You would have watched the movie Ironman. I liked this movie since I loved the way Robert Downey Jr. had played the role of Tony Stark. I found his French beard and hairstyle really adorning. But, I would like to disclose the fact that you won't find anything related to that movie in this post. If you are searching for a movie review, please quit reading further. In this post, I would be discussing about an interesting character, who lives very closer to my place. A family consisting of a dad, a mom and a younger brother is all that he owns apart from the half trousers and shirts which he puts on. He is a puny guy whose life runs on alcohol. In fact, I should say his life is swimming across an ocean of alcohol.:P Whenever we take the game of cricket to the street, we would lose at least 2 minutes because of this guy, who needs a lot of time to walk from one end of the street to the other since the path he follows would be totally uncertain and even God doesn't know what he would step on the next moment. Some of my friends even admire this guy because no matter how much alcohol occupies the small space provided by his stomach, he would still walk, though not along a straight path. Sometimes, he would even encourage the cricketer within him by grabbing the cricket bat from us and commands the bowler to bowl the best delivery he could! It was almost 11P.M last night when I went out to get some bananas which would make good food during late night blogging. I found this guy talking something to the Deity inside a small temple at the end of the street. After passing by him, I heard a sudden thump behind me and I turned around to find the man lying down with his back flat on the ground. I wasn't in a position to help him get on his feet because I feared my dad would suspect me for drinking! Hence, all that I managed to do was to give job for my 1.3 Mega pixel mobile camera. Here is the picture that shows you the Indian version of Ironman!

Hellooooo...

Today, I came across an incident which I found to be extremely funny. It was about the phone conversation my one of my friends had few days back. The fact is that it wasn't a conversation because I understand something can be called a conversation only if it involves two or more persons exchanging words in the form of questions and replies. Here, my friend was the only one who was involved in the 'CONVERSATION'. (I don't know what I should call this other than a one-end conversation. :-P) It seems my friend wanted to learn German since he would be leaving for Germany very soon. He decided to ask a consultancy for some help regarding the matter and tried contacting them over the phone. As soon as he finished dialing, he heard a female voice shooting some instructions at him. My friend is such a keen listener that he couldn't make a noise at his end and was listening to whatever the female voice prompted. Finally, the silence was broken! My friend opened up with a question which was "Hello, I would like to know about the German learning course". There was no response from the female on the other end. Confused, my friend wanted to make sure she heard whatever he said. He asked "Hello, is there anyone on that side? Can you tell me about the German Learning Course?" Again, there was a prolonged silence. Finally, my friend heard a beep followed by the female's message which was "Please enter an input. Press 1 for technical assistance, 2 for course details....(so on)". That was when my friend realized he had been trying to pull a computer generated voice into a conversation with him. :-P I almost laughed my stomach out watching this guy explaining the scenario with the exact body languages and voice modulations he carried while talking to the automatic voice message. Sometimes, we don't know how funny we are. When we fail to sense such funny incidents in which we are involved, we are missing out on some of the best moments of life. It won't be a shame to get fooled all the time. When you can draw a line between shameful and funny incidents, you can call yourself a best judge of all your actions. If you consider even the funny incidents shameful, there are few things you need to learn from the book of life. Never miss a chance to laugh at your own self. Understand the difference between being shameful and funny.

Spanking the kangaroos..

The undeniable fact is that Australian cricket lost its face in front of billions around the world. Indians have proved knockouts are not only the Kangaroos' trait but even Tigers can punch the hell out of the Australian cricketing spirit. Today, Australian bowlers were treated the way I treat my 10 year old nephew while we play cricket, by the Indian batsmen. Laxman and Gambhir own the credits since they paved the two parallel rails for the Indian train to run over the kangaroos. Gambhir was so confident which was reflected blatantly by the way he came down for almost all the deliveries Johnson bowled. Also, Watson wasn't really having the mindset to accept the fact that India is a better cricketing team than Australia and he vented his frustrations by raising his right arm in front of Gambhir's face while the latter was on his way to the other end for a run. This was where everything started and thus, Watson stand at the front unlike what the whole of Australian team alleges. While Gambhir was running back to the striker's end for converting the single into a double, he retaliated by hitting Watson on his bulky belly which gave the Eastern Pussies a reason to admonish the Indian side once again. Australians think the rule books are made only for the reference of other cricketing teams and not for them at all. They think they make the rules and hence they have all the legitimate rights to break what they suppose they make. This gray attitude of the team has led to the great downfall of the Australian cricket and cricket in Australia is deep down an awful depression. I often stress on the point that cricket is no more a Gentleman's game. I still hold on to this fact and once again, I'll put the existence of the game in Australia at the top of the list of reasons why it shouldn't be called that way anymore. After all, we can't expect good manners from the cricketers belonging to the land of hooligans.

Arrogant Aussies..

Unfortunately, the first test between India and Australia ended in a draw. As an ardent Indian cricket lover, I expected the match to go India's way after the great recovery produced by Zaheer and Bajji, who had been burdened with the extra responsibility to prove their worth with the bat. Zaheer stole the show from the Australians who seemed venomous and strong but proved that they are a bunch of 11 clowns who lost their course after the Turbanator and Zaheer took charge of the bat. When top order batsmen like Sachin and Laxman couldn't hold on to their crease for long, these two boys who are on the side just to take care of the bowling department did more than what was actually expected from them and proved the world Australians aren't as hard as they used to describe themselves. Had Bajji not been affected by the first degree cramp on his left leg, he would have stayed for a much longer time at the crease and would have even made efforts to reach his first test match century. To avoid making him feel lonely, Zaheer would have jumped in the party to put up another 3 figure individual score on the scorecard. Australian bowling lacked the vigor that was found in it when bowlers like McGrath occupied a spot in the team. Also, the side lacked basic courtesy and respect for the game and the opponent players as well. Even after ICC warned players to stay away from on-field sledging, Shane Watson tried to play dirty tricks on Zaheer who was in a great touch with his bat. Watson was totally unlucky because all his efforts went up with the flames and Zaheer moved steadily towards a half century. Australians were totally lost and Ponting would have started weeping right in front of the Bengaluru crowd for being such an ineffective captain and failing to capitalize on the initial breakthroughs in the form of Sachin's and Laxman's wickets. His frustration burst out at the end of the game and he took it on Zaheer for a general press statement released by the latter. Now, the entire Australian nation is frustrated by the way Indians stole the limelight and the Australian media found this as a better one than a good reason to drag the Indian team over the coal. The media came up with whatever issue was available which can rightly be defined by few words like senseless, stupid, absurd, insane and everything more close to these. Allegations are totally against Dada, who, according to Australian media, forced the umpires to consider stopping the play temporarily due to bad light. I never knew Australian media are so stupid and I thought Indian version is the worst in the world. A batsman can request the umpires to consider dropping the play for few minutes in case the quality of light becomes too low. They proceed by saying that Ganguly took 5 minutes to enter the field back again after all the Australian team members came out to the field. Hey, what were the Australians doing the whole day? Were they waiting for these 5 minutes to bag the 6 wickets that were left at that time? 6 wickets in 5 minutes? Are they trying to tell us Australians made it a part of a big plan to make a world record by capturing 6 wickets in 5 minutes after giving up all the time they were left with on that day? This forces me to conclude with only one statement.

'We've been watching our Indian players play against a team of 11 jesters for the past 5 days who were trained by a master jester in the name of a coach'

Closing in on Kodai plan..

Finally, the day is about to come. In another 20 hours, if everything goes as planned, we would be in the train exactly at this time tomorrow on our way to Madurai. This Kodaikanal plan is something that is pending for a really long time now. Last year, we went to Kodaikanal as soon as I came back from my Kullu-Manali tour with college friends. When it comes to striking a balance between the importance I attach to school friends and college friends, I think I am a pro. I managed to plan a couple of tours with my college friends and my school friends as well. We had to come across so many hurdles to reach the position we are in now. We have got the train tickets to Madurai, which is the closest city to Kodai. First, it was one of my friends' parents who said they want their son to get employed before going on a fun trip. We tried everything within our scope to get him into the world of profession. Unfortunately, the company which recruited this guy put him on hold for four months to release the results of the four rounds of interviews my friend faced. At last, he received a call from the I.T firm and they said he has been selected to work for them. That was when the plan got back its life once again. Now, the atmosphere looks so jubilant because we are about to execute a plan that has been in the bag for a very long time now. We have been waiting for almost 8 months now to set things right for this plan to workout well. Hey my dear fellow bloggers and my most respectful followers and readers, I won't be seen here for the next 4 days. I'll join you in the blog league very soon! Have a great time blogging around!

Past, Present & Future

“One of the most brilliant and astounding topics to talk about is the ‘Time’”

This is how the teacher started the class when she planned to teach her students something related to time.

She proceeded, “You all know why? Nobody knows the answers for questions regarding time that begin with ‘where, when, who and what’. Because, noone knows what lies in their future. Nobody remembers everything that happened in their past. Nobody knows when exactly the universal time started. Nobody knows…..hmmmm” She gave a slight grin at Mickey who was munching something.

Mickey immediately realized from the sudden silence of the teacher that something has gone wrong in the class. In an attempt to hide all those left outs inside the draw, he spilled the water in his water container on the floor.

The teacher, at the pinnacle of her anger, asked him to stand up and explain to the class what he had been doing all these time when she was spending all her precious time explaining about time. Teacher reacted “What was going on there when I was struggling here to push something into all the 32 heads?” Mickey, with a low voice replied “Ma’am, I was doing something to understand time” Teacher responded “Oh. Okay. Can you tell us how?” .Sarcastic. The smart kid spontaneously started off with an explanation “You see. It’s indeed an interesting and astounding topic like you said” Teacher “Come on dear. Explain it.” Again, she had a sarcastic tone. Mickey decided to take a chance and started speaking out “Ma’am, I go with you completely for your statement which was ‘Nobody knows about their future and nobody remembers everything that happened in their past. Everything is fine. I was thinking over it”.

He continued “In the past, I never knew that in the future, which is my present now, I’ll be eating in your class. Now, at present, which was my future in the past, I didn’t expect a teacher to question me for eating in the class. I’m really not scared of being punished in the future for, I would be punished which would become my present in the short future and becomes my past as soon I suffer it. I’m so confident about the future since I know what you would have decided to do with me in the future at present which would be my past in the future and I’m so confident that it would soon become the present, which is the future at this moment, and it would soon turn out to be my past. I even wonder if I could repeat what happened in the past, which is also the past at present, in the future, then will I be given the same punishment which you would be giving me in the future, which is of course the future of the future? In this case, the mistake I committed in the past becomes my action in the present, which is the future at present, and I would be punished in the future, which is also the future of the present. So…” Tweety birds started circling the teacher’s head and she started speaking “Mickey, I understand….” Mickey never gave the teacher a chance to interrupt him and he proceeded “I would like to remind you that in the past, which was the future at that time, when I tried to interrupt while you were talking, without realizing what’s going to happen in the future at present, which is now the past, you immediately stopped me at that time which was the present at that time, and it was also the future of the moment when I tried to interrupt you and it ultimately became the past in the future, which is the past now. So, ma’am, I kindly request you at present which was once the future, not to interrupt me in the future until I complete explaining you about my understanding of the past, present and the future, which was the topic you were about to explain in the past, which was the present in the past and which is right now the past. I’m not sure whether you would teach us about the ‘Time’ in the future, which, if you do, would become the present in the future, and also the past in the far future. Thank you for accepting my request in the past, which was the future at that moment, of not interrupting me while I carry on with my explanation.” Teacher, who was sweating profusely, remained silent for a moment.

The whole class was struck with dull silence. It gave everyone the feeling they would have had if they had been standing next to a railway track with a train moving fast on it for few minutes.

After recovering herself from what had just happened, the teacher said “Mickey, you really think I would like to carry on with this topic after all these terrible things that happened just a few moments back? No way. I have no idea what this should be called” One student raised her hand, stood up and told “ma’am, you should call it the future right? Because, Mickey was talking about this thing in the future which is the past now and…” even before the girl could complete what she had in her mind, the teacher strated screaming. “OHHH MY GODDDD!!!!” those were the last words which the teacher spoke before she ran out of the class which was the present at that time and which was once the future when Mickey was explaining about the past, present and the future, which is now the past.

Time is indeed an interesting and astounding topic. Moral: Use the past, present and the future properly and JUDICIOUSLY in order to make the teachers flee away from the class.